Oh, how He loves me. [Reality Check!]

I am buried in frustration. I am buried in stress. I am buried in failure.

Oh, how He loves, yes, He loves ME

I need to remember this, like yesterday. No really, the small things are about to make bigger things become my issue.

As a believer I should realize how great God's love and mercy are for me. I should not get buried and caught up in these moments of frustration, stress, and failure. I should pray more, let go and let God. I should turn my worries and fears to Him. Only He can make sense of it all.

I really should.

Why do we have this tendency to get so overwhelmed by things that really aren't "things" at all? I mean lets be real. Stop and think about those that don't have running water and central heat & air, would ya?! C'mon Ashley!

How about those that don't even have proper medical care or advanced treatment options? How about those children that are left to die of some crazy disease and that is simply their life? How about the orphanages that are full of children who just want to be loved? I really need to get myself together, geez!

Do you have "stressors" currently that others are wishing they had? I do. Shameful.

Recent Stressors (ie. Ashley's First World Problems):

-My son, his upcoming surgery & recovery. Removal of tonsils & adenoids, tubes in ears, and the allergy panel. A week at home with mom & Jay to recover full of ice cream and jello, yes please! And I am stressing about this, why?

-My job. Because my son stays sick all the time I use ALL of my sick time on him (praying also that his surgery takes care of this issue) I will be scrambling to work 11-12 hour days for the next two weeks to make up for the time I will be out and not have to use any additional time off. So thankful for a giving boss. Makes my work/life/sick child balance much easier. Thinking now that going to Vegas was really even more of a bad idea. If only we knew how to look into the future?!

-My husband. God bless his soul. He gets the lovely pleasure of being the one I take all of this frustration out on. Praying for his sanity and strength to deal with me right now. It's really not an easy task and there wasn't a single girlfriend one that didn't warm him, not to mention the lovely things my brother tried to warn him of. Thanks Jeff, those are coming in handy now!

-My dogs. Both are about to drive me to unhealthy/ungodly habits. No seriously. If I wake up at 5:30am one more time with a house full of dog poop I am going to loose all control. And quite frankly there is nothing more pleasing than coming home to the smell of dog mess from them pooping in their kennels and running around in it, joyful! Anyone up for a carpet shampooing party at my house? I'll buy the pizza! It could be fun?!

-My appliance situation. My washer has busted and my dryer smells like something is burning. I really shouldn't complain, they lasted 10 years and weren't top of the line when I got them. Not to mention how many times in my short stink in Lubbock they were moved around! I changed apartments every 6 months! yah! for spending $2k to get new ones.  All in God's timing, right?!

When it rains it pours, but He won't give me any more than I can handle, never has. This is just another sign from God asking me to lean more on Him. Walk more with Him. Trust more in Him.

"When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory and I realize how beautiful You are and how great Your affections are for me!!!"

Must keep singing this song today! Must.


Okay really, now I will take a step back. I need to be thankful that 1) I have a baby, I know many that would love a baby; 2) I have great insurance & high tech medical advancements to treat my sick child; 3) I have a job, many do not; 4) I have a loving, devoted husband that deals with me and never ceases to amaze me, some don't; 5) my fur babies are just as special and I am lucky to have their unconditional love; and lastly 6) I have the ability to even have a washer & dryer.

My God loves me even when I am selfish, shameful, greedy, and ungrateful. Why?! I do not deserve such love, or do I?

Do you have "first world stressors"? I am sure most would answer, yes! Have you taken a step back and really analyzed these stressors? Have you asked God for guidance on these stressors?

What triggers you to take a step back? To have a self proclaimed reality check?

Is it a song? A situation? A comment from another?

God's grace is enough!

Have a little faith......reminding myself and you today!!